It’s called white lies. Little manoeuvres, tricks, lies that women say to prevent men from knowing what they really are upto.

We wouldn’t call this cheating…but yes, if you look at it, it can be called cheating in secret. Women don’t always tell the truth in certain things.

Weight

Yeah, that’s is certainly a touchy topic with women. They never want you know their actual weight. Just like men say ‘No’ when asked by a woman ‘ Am I looking fat?’ women too resort to some fibbing. A 80 kilo automatically drops a few of those kilos to a modest 70 kilos or 65 kilos, despite appearances suggesting otherwise. It is all light hearted, mind you. A girl wouldn’t want her boyfriend or husband think she is piling on the pounds.

Food

Related to weight and it is something every woman resorts to. You ask your girlfriend or your wife, have you had lunch? The answer, ‘ Yes, salad and water or just a sandwich’. In reality, they would have gulped down a four-course meal, complete with dessert in tow but will not disclose. May be it is the pity card they want to play or maybe they just want to communicate that they watch what they eat but don’t  want you to know of their guilty cravings. Also, how can we forget this one- You ask your girlfriend, whether they are hungry and their anwer is No. But when the food comes, your plate of food ends majorly in her mouth.

I don’t know

Ha, you know nothing Jon Snow! When a woman replies ‘I don’t know’ be careful. It means there is a whole lot she is not letting you know. You, my  men need to figure that on your own. See we love being mysterious in that way.

It was on sale

One word – SALE is enough to get the purses empty. Gucci shoes, Zara top, Mac make-up kit, those pair of shoes which we will never wear more than once are all bought on ‘sale’. Yes, women will never like to admit the tears or the money they splurged on that piece of beauty, we would not like to give you a heart attack of Rs 7000 or Rs 3000.

I am on my period

Yeah, men probably hate this time of the month.  It is a convenient excuse women sometimes use to get their way out of sex. We just can’t bear the thought of  saying an outright no, so a headache and periods sometimes does come in handy as our cheat card.

It was great!

Now, you know why men hear it this line so often the morning after. We don’t want to hurt your feelings, so even if it was a middling performance, the go to answer is always – It was the best I ever had, or it was amazing or it was great’.

My phone’s battery is dead

C’mon men, admit it, even you use this line, when you know you have ignored a call or a text.  Women often end up saying this when they know you will interrupt their good time, or want to find an excuse for coming home late from that party or it can become a convenient reason as to why they missed your frantic 100 missed calls and texts.

I don’t speak to him anymore

Yes, the clean slate trick. It’s better to let things remain that way when you know how possessive men can be about their wives or girlfriends speaking to their male friends or ex boyfriends. Depsite the fact that some women are absolutely faithful to their partners, this little indiscretion of speaking to their male friends is the little spark of freedom they like to enjoy. Boys, admit it. You do it yourselves.

 

And to make matters easier we can list a few down as pointers

I am fine- What they really mean is ‘I am hurting like hell or am absolutely mad, can’t wait to take it out on you’.

I am working that day- An easy excuse to get out of something they dislike

You look good- For the sake of giving you a compliment and also not breaking your excited heart.

Of course, I love you- Well, it means- generally I do love you, but at this moment all my love for you is under my heel and I am squishing it with all my might. It also means, man you have done something to make her really angry.