Rapists' perception of their victims prove that its the mind that needs to be checked, not women
- Rapists usually perceive their victims as objects of desire.
- Some of them even recalled thinking that their victims wanted it until they saw their faces.
- Rapists mostly had a disturbed childhood and raping gives them a sense of power.
Follow"It's in the mind", the proverb holds a strong meaning in every context we place it in. The weakness, freedom, speech, strength everything is in the mind. At least that is what we believe these days. Men and women are equal in every aspect of life, but given the rising atrocities against women all over India, we are bound to interpret things in a different way.
Take the case of the 35-year old woman and a mother of three, kidnapped and raped in a moving van and then flung out of the car by her tormentors. She was just another commodity for them like the beer cans and soft-drink bottles thrown at the site along with her. If that sounds raw, brace yourself for more. To remind the readers of the woman who was gangraped by three men in a moving auto and how they flung her baby out of the vehicle, would be spine-chilling. The woman was seen travelling with the baby's dead body in the metro the next day.
They didn't fight enough, many would say. So, what if we are the 'weaker' sex? We still have our pepper sprays and our will power. We can still kick, bite, pull, can't we? Then consider this, a 7-year old girl was raped too. How do you think she would have defended herself? It could probably be her uncle, a minor neighbour she played with, or even her own father whom she trusted with all her heart. What are the defence mechanisms against these people?
In my opinion, there is nothing much we can do unless the mind transforms, the way we perceive rape or violation of a woman, the way we see women as such. True, the weaknesses lie in us too, but society is to be blamed for that. We have been trained to be submissive to the other sex and act along its whims and fancies. We have accepted the fact, howmuchever we go to work and earn on our own, our actual place is still in the kitchen, we still look for financial and emotional securities in a man and have not learnt to trust ourselves in the first place. While submissiveness is in our mind, a man's perception of a woman is in the mind too.
Otherwise, it is beyond anyone's imagination what pleasure a 7-year old or for that matter a few months-old baby can give. The fact that she belongs to the opposite sex and the fact that her body has to be 'trained' for something like this is a great turn-on.
There are numerous excuses that men have been giving to justify their action. For instance this,
"Most girls don't really understand how horny guys are, how much stronger guys are, how guys will rationalize what they do. I see feminists and women on the Internet saying that no means no and women should be able to get as drunk as they want and not be sexually assaulted, and I couldn't agree me. But the reality of the situation is that women have to be careful because guys are one way when they're hanging out and another way when they're horny or worse drunk and horny. That doesn't make what happened okay, but it is what it is."
This was recalled by a rapist on jezebel.com who had raped an acquaintance after a party.In another site Mamamia, the project involved 19-year old Grace Borwn who photographed rape victims with a banner with quotes from their rapist. Here are the disturbing details:
The way they objectify women:
"At least you are skinny enough now someone would want to rape you".
Or when they determine your intentions for you:
"I know you want it"
"It wasn't rape. You were being such a tease."
Most of the rapists have often said that they feel a sense of power over their victims everytime they committed the crime. Most of them either had a disturbed childhood or were abused by their relatives. So, they did this to make themselves feel better. But, what power does raping a minor or even a baby bestow on a rapist? This, certainly, does not have an answer. Probably is the lack of restraint or just a random impulsive habit.
Indeed, this impulse is not restricted to one place or territory, neither does it restrict itself to certain class or community of people. Rape happens across borders and socio-economic classes. It's there in the mind after all!
